Short Post 10/14

I found this week's readings very interesting. I have always been in support of gay marriage; the idea that allowing gay marriage could be harmful to gay and lesbian couples never even crossed my mind. I never considered the possibility that marriage might constrain gays and lesbians and force them to assimilate into the mainstream, what society deems as normal, and thereby go against one of the main goals of gay liberation, an acceptance of all kinds of relationships. After thinking about the readings, I realized that gay and lesbian couples, like women, face a double-bind: if they do get married (assuming that it is legal in their state), they might feel as they are conforming to society's notion of what the right relationship is and not making their relationship into something that they want it to be. However, if they don't get married, they are denied many basic protections and rights that are given to married couples, such as hospital visitation rights, health insurance, social security benefits, and home protection. Many same-sex married couples are often discriminated against when trying to adopt, however, non-married same-sex couples face even more discrimination. How are gay and lesbians couples supposed to win? Our social institutions and systems are designed for them to lose. How is it fair that same-sex couples are forced to choose between what they believe in and basic legal rights?